Just As I Should Be

We stand in the hallway waiting for the next class. I search for words to speak, to reach out and share but they don’t come. My mind empties and I am cloaked in that awkward, uncomfortable feeling that is so familiar. I sink back against the wall hoping it will swallow me up, to just disappear until the next class arrives for pictures.
They are moms just like me.
They are there to give their time to help at school just like me.
Why can’t I talk to them?
Why must I be so shy?
At 40, why haven’t I grown out of this or gotten over it or something? And I dare to ask yet again, with pain gripping the center of my soul, “Why did you make me this way?”

Janet is a mom to two daughters and is married to her best friend. Her belief that we are blessed so that we may bless others fuels her writing at frugalandfocused.com where she shares her thoughts on faith, family, and frugal living. She strives to make the most of what she's given in life and hopes to inspire others to do the same.